"Hannah's Hopeful Hearts" Photo Album

In case you weren't able to join us at Hannah's Hopeful Hearts 2015, here are some photos by Ronda Broatch, shared by Reba Ferguson on Facebook.

Photo credit: Ronda Broatch

Photo credit: Ronda Broatch

Katie and Hannah's photos with glassybabies. Photo credit: Ronda Broatch

 Butterflies: the symbol of resurrection. Photo credit: Ronda Broatch

The food & flowers were simply outstanding. Photo credit: Ronda Broatch

Photo credit: Ronda Broatch

Photo credit: Ronda Broatch

Photo credit: Ronda Broatch

Photo credit: Ronda Broatch

Dr. Jim Olson. Photo credit: Ronda Broatch

Introducing Dr. Mike Jensen. Photo credit: Ronda Broatch

Dr. Jensen. Photo credit: Ronda Broatch

Dr. Olson and Dr. Jensen discussing their work, moderated by Fred. Photo credit: Ronda Broatch

Hannah's Hopeful Hearts. Photo credit: Ronda Broatch

Fred facilitating the paddle raise. Photo credit: Ronda Broatch

There is still time to give, and you can  ask your employer to match your gift (Boeing did this for us, and doubled our impact)! Thanks, Boeing!
All you need to do is direct your gift to:
Megen Strand
Crush Kids’ Cancer Guild 
Tax ID# 27319304 Seattle Children's Hospital Guild Association
M/S S-200, PO Box 5371, Seattle, WA 98145
Crush Kids’ Cancer Guild 
Tax ID# 273193047
 If you have any questions, please call Megen at 206-987-4823.

And here is the Hunt-Ferguson family who made it all possible, especially the valiant-hearted, light-bringing woman in the center, Reba - mother of Hannah, who inspired all of this!
I love you, Reba!

Jikiden Reiki with Tadao Yamaguchi

If you have any interest in studying and practicing Reiki, here is a wonderful opportunity in Seattle:

TadaoYamaguchi and his mother are the founders of Jikiden Reiki; his mother was a student of Chujiro Hayashi sensei. Hayashi sensei was taught by the founder of Usui Reiki Ryoho, Mikao Usui.
Mr. Yamaguchi is my Reiki master's teacher.

If you have any questions, please contact Emerald City Reiki Center, or info@jikiden.org.

All of Creation is a Song of Praise to God

Japanese Garden, Bloedel Reserve

 The fire has its flame and praises God.
  The wind blows the flame and praises God.
In the voice we hear the word which praises God.
  And the word, when heard, praises God.
So all of creation is a song of praise to God. 

- St. Hildegard of Bingen

  
Strolling each week at the Bloedel Reserve is continuing to inspire and bring solace and healing to me, even in places where I didn't anticipate healing. One of those areas is ART.

The shapes and colors of the leaves, and the changes in the landscape from week to week keep me in deep, yet gentle observation. It is like Christmas morning each time I start out walking the paths. I move in different directions on different days - responding intuitively to the mood and the map. I find that I observe as an artist, and even if I think "I won't take photos today," I can't NOT take them. I am seeing - and composing with my eye - as an artist, and it's joyful.

It so happens that one of my favorite art bloggers, Collage Diva, started a new project using mandalas. She calls it #100MandalasChallenge, and the idea is to create 100 Mandalas in 100 days.

I'm not sure I'll complete it in that amount of time - and there is no pressure to do so - but I am loving drawing mandalas using the Zentangle concept of Zendalas, inspired by all that I see at the Bloedel Reserve.

Here are a few of my drawings...

It's relaxing and fun to draw in this way. It has opened me up and relieved some of the stress I felt around doing artwork. It is play, not work, and it comes naturally, rather than being forced.

I'm deeply thankful for this season of strolling, healing and renewed creative energy. It is a time of quiet joy and praise to our Creator.

This struck me as a "faerie's-eye view" of the Bloedel residence

 No detail is too small for the Creator's creativity. I love that fact.

Light a Lamp for Someone

“If you light a lamp for someone, it will brighten your own path.” - The Buddha

It has been a long time since I've sat down with my sewing machine and made a quilt. Most of my guild work is made up of the duties of the president:  running errands, ordering supplies, receiving donations, attending to correspondence, communication, dropping off quilts for delivery, answering questions, coordinating activity. I have missed the creative part of simply making quilts for patients, but my skills have been needed elsewhere.

Katie's Comforters Guild receives beautiful gifts of new fabric, and I distribute it to those who make quilts. Some smaller pieces remain, however, and yesterday, I decided to try my hand at free-form sewing to make them into quilt tops. I knew that Lucile (our 90+ year-old guild member who sews nearly a quilt a day) would finish them, if I could turn some of the smaller pieces into larger ones.

Lucile gave me a lesson in how to do this a while ago, and I have been impressed by the fantastic creations which she and others like Bonnie P. and Polly have made with smaller pieces and "scraps" of fabric. While I'm nowhere near their level of expertise (or patience), I was able to make five quilt tops.

Fabric sewed into strips, then cut, turned and sewed back together

You could cut and turn these again to mix it up even more

Pale yellows on either side of deep blue

This has brought me a great deal of pleasure and satisfaction, and is so much fun that I'm finding it hard to stop - there are so many creative possibilities! If you have small pieces of fabric and don't know what to do with them, try sewing them into strips, and then cut the strips, turn them around, and sew them back together. It is easy enough for a beginner (like me), is a good way to use fabrics which don't appear at first to go together, and it is a great experience in simple design for beginning quilters.

Since I am awaiting "the call" to my next adventure (finished with class, putting feelers out for meaningful work, sharing my book, getting the house in order, letting go...), I am in a liminal space. This quote was encouraging, and is one reason why I brought the sewing machine out: 

"Those that be perfect (in union with God) carry always this mind, that when they perceive their labour to be fruitless in one place, to remove straight to another, where more good may be done." - Gregory the Great [6th C.], "Dialogues" "Sometimes we need to let go and move on or we do damage to ourselves and others. Where might this be the case at this time in your life?" - A Daily Spiritual Seed (subscribe HERE)

Since my dreams for the video came to a standstill, I have been seeking the place "where more good may be done." Sewing for patients of the hospital is a good place to do some good; it always brightens my spirits and takes me out of myself. This is a welcome movement for anyone whose life has been turned upside down. Even with the love of friends and family, there is a sense of isolation and "otherness" which tends to lead one's thoughts inward. Doing something for others helps to turn my heart outward.

A beautiful prayer, courtesy of the Center for Action and Contemplation:

"May each of us be so fortunate as to be overtaken by God in the midst of little things. May we each be so blessed as to be finished off by God, swooping down from above or welling up from beneath, to extinguish the illusion of separateness that perpetuates our fears. May we, in having our illusory, separate self slain by God, be born into a new and true awareness of who we really are: one with God forever. May we continue on in this true awareness, seeing in each and every little thing we see the fullness of God’s presence in our lives. May we also be someone in whose presence others are better able to recognize God’s presence in their lives, so that they, too, might know the freedom of the children of God." - James Finley

“The personal life deeply lived always expands into truths beyond itself.” - Anais Nin

Present to The Presence

"What we’re doing in contemplation is learning, quite simply, how to be present. That is the only way to encounter any other presence, including God in prayer, Jesus in the Eucharist, and Jesus in others. The change is all and always on our side. God is present everywhere all the time. There really is not much point in arguing about IF and HOW Jesus is present in the bread and wine; simply be present yourself and you will know all that you need to know. It is an exercise in surrender and presence from your side alone.

"...God is always given from God’s side, but we have to learn how to receive such total givenness, which is a very vulnerable position for humans. So Jesus said 'Eat it' and did not say 'think about it,' which is our defensive control tower. The Christian strategy seems to be this: struggle with divine presence in one focused, determined, and assured place (bread and wine, which is just about as universal a symbol as you can get)—and from that moment of space and time move to all space and all time..." -Richard Rohr, adapted from CAC Foundation Set: Gospel Call to Compassionate Action (Bias from the Bottom) and Contemplative Prayer

I love this piece by Father Rohr. It speaks to me because everything in our world moves so fast, and is now full of mental - as well as audible - noise. The internet, our mobile devices, WIFI, telephone, TV, parties, news...words abound, delivered through voices everywhere, and what are they saying? Is it something we need to hear, something of blessing, or is it just noise?

It is easy to become addicted to the noisy input and constant contact. I would never have guessed that it could be addictive, because I love silence, but it is - studies are showing this to be true, in a Pavlov's-dogs sort of way. The phone/device emits a "ding," and we are so addicted to the "rush" which it elicits that we have to  - we cannot NOT - respond to it. Why else would people take risks such as typing (not watching where they are going) while operating a motor vehicle at speed?

Fr. Rohr's words point to a reality which is vital in human relationships: presence. I recently spoke about healing presence in my graduation speech at the Academy. Healing presence is something which each of us possesses, to varying degrees, and the primary element in it is our presence - we must first show up, not just in body, but in mind, heart and spirit. Our genuine presence has the potential to bring healing to any situation.

Practicing true, full presence is much more challenging than it sounds in this busy, noisy world - a world where we engage in multiple activities at the same time - but it is truly worth the effort. Meditation and contemplative prayer teach us to practice presence. Sitting in silence for even one minute is not easy, but it is powerfully revealing.

Taking a position about who is allowed to receive the Eucharist, and what it means, is thinking about, rather than entering into, presence. "So Jesus said 'Eat it' and did not say 'think about it,' which is our defensive control tower." These words are simple genius. "Our defensive control tower" could also be noise, busyness, entertainment and ceaseless action, or response to the "ringtones" in our lives.

When I receive the Eucharist and "Do this in remembrance" of Jesus, somehow, I am gently opened. He comes into my offered presence as nourishment, food and drink, and is taken into my being on a cellular level. He is invited and received into my body, heart and mind. Eating the bread and drinking the wine is a way in which I can offer humility, openness, need, and gratitude. It is one of the reasons I love to participate in worship: the Presence meeting my presence - our collective presence - as gift.

This poem by Lynn Ungar was read in worship service on Sunday:

Salvation
By what are you saved: And how?
Saved like a bit of string,
tucked away in a drawer?
Saved like a child rushed from
a burning building, already
singed and coughing smoke?
Or are you salvaged
like a car part - the one good door
when the rest is wrecked?

Do you believe me when I say
you are neither salvaged nor saved,
but salved, anointed by gentle hands
where you are most tender?
Haven't you seen
the way snow curls down
like a fresh sheet, how it
covers everything,
makes everything
beautiful, without exception?

May our days be filled with moments of true presence to the One who is always present to us.

Trembling Buns of Stage Fright

yesterday's sunrise. the hanging silverware is part of wind-chime

"In the inner wine cellar 
I drank of my Beloved, and, 
when I went abroad 
Through all this valley 
I no longer knew anything, 
And lost the herd which I was following...
I no longer tend the herd
Nor have I any other work
Now that my every act is love." 
 - St. John of the Cross, on the Journey of the Soul to God by Contemplation, from The Spiritual Canticle

What a beautiful way to see our life's journey! 

"I lost the herd which I was following...now...my every act is love." 

How I would love to live that way! 

The final National Speakers Association Northwest Academy's class presentation went well. I was one of the last in the queue to present, so I got lots of practice in "the art of being present" under pressure. Since my topic was The Art of Healing Presence, that was appropriate!

Have I mentioned that I really do not enjoy public speaking? 

One of the reasons I enrolled in this Academy is that I am increasingly uncomfortable at the podium. Having given speeches to benefit The Moyer Foundation, Seattle Children's Hospital and Camp Goodtimes West (now The Goodtimes Project) in front of hundreds of people, I find it is not getting easier; it is getting more difficult. I thought that studying with professional speakers would help me to get over that.

That's not what happened. I learned that even professional speakers get stage fright, but they learn to manage it - and to manage many of the things which give rise to fear about taking the stage, such as mechanical glitches, unexpected problems with venue, etc. 

My greatest fear is that I might go completely blank, mentally, forgetting what I mean to say in the midst of saying it. I have to use notes. This is one of the reasons I went to the effort of creating a video a while ago. My topic is very dear to my heart, and it contains painful elements; the story is emotional, which makes it hard to repeat in speech after speech. 

Since the video is unusable in its current form (too long, & without a navigable menu), and my relationship with the videographer/editor fell apart a year ago, I found myself with an important message and a broken vehicle. I decided to get out of that vehicle (imagine the video was a car, in a ditch) and get on a bicycle (the bicycle is public speaking). It's far more labor-intensive in every way than showing a video, but I wanted to give it a try, to see if I could grow, improve my skills and share the message in another way.

There is a great deal to learn about the business of public speaking; it's larger and more complex than I imagined. I learned that I am better suited to lead an interactive workshop than I am to give a keynote speech - at least, that's where I am now. I prefer feedback and dialogue to having the entire spotlight on me.

Here's the funny part of the final exam: over the past six years, when I have been invited to speak, I have experienced various symptoms of stage fright. I've had "butterflies" of nervousness, shaking legs and knees, felt like I might faint or be sick - all of which were managed, and, fortunately, not noticeable to the audiences. On Wednesday evening, I experienced a brand-new symptom of stage nerves: my buns trembled uncontrollably. That's right: for the first time ever, I had a shivering derriere. 

It would have been hilarious, if I hadn't been so busy concentrating on my speech, and hoping that no one could see my behind shaking in fear, from the semi-circular seating arrangement in the auditorium. I could certainly feel it! I stood at a table with a lectern on it, so the lectern blocked that part of me; no one noticed, by grace. Here's hoping that the video-camera didn't pick it up!

I gained a great deal from attending the Academy, but (obviously) still have stage fright.

Here is a photo of our group that night, courtesy of facebook:

Our wonderful Dean, Jan McLaughlin, is the one wearing orange. If you ever need customer service training for your business, see Jan at www.yourcommunicationconnection.com

When I got up the next morning, God was showing His artistic flair. The sunrise progressed from the photo above, to this

to this (these photos were not retouched):

What a gift! The beauty of nature lifts the heart; thanks be to God for the glory of His creation! 

I have recently been in touch with some professors who have invited me to speak to their medical students, and am so looking forward to the opportunity to share with them what I've learned because of Katie (and from my classes in the Academy). I pray to go forth from here, now a bit better equipped to serve, so that "my every act is love"...even if I go with trembling buns.