Aloha - A Luau - Addition

One important addition to the "Aloha - A Luau" story: check out this link to Paul Dudley's blog. It's a great moment (be sure you turn up the sound) - you'll get to hear what Codi has to say.
Love and prayers for Codi and her family!

Aloha - A Luau

Last weekend, we were privileged to attend a very special party. It was a Luau, which was an item on the lifetime-wish-list of a wonderful young lady, Codi, who is currently being treated for her 4th ocurrence of cancer. If you were to look up “courage” in the dictionary, her photo ought to be there, right next to the definition. She is beautiful in a luminous and deep way. She reminded me of Katie, because the rigors of cancer treatment have not dimmed that beauty at all.

If you are a reader of my blog, you will know that my family and I are great fans of the American Cancer Society’s Camp Goodtimes West, on Vashon Island. Our children attended this camp, just weeks before Katie’s relapse, and it was a very important gift to them, and to us.

The camp staff are a wonderful group of young people, committed to making sure that cancer patients, their siblings, and former cancer patients all have a fabulous time, just being KIDS. They experience 6 days of fun, games, camaraderie, sports, a dance, skits, a carnival, a cruise and just “hanging out,” enjoying camp activities. There are nurses and an oncologist on staff, right on site. Having cancer does not prevent - or interfere greatly with - the fun at camp. For a brief time, kids can simply be one of the gang – instead of being so very different from other kids, because of their illness (and the worries and trials that it brings).

Katie was interviewed by the local paper while she was a camper at Camp Goodtimes West, and she told the reporter that she liked it there because people didn’t judge others if they had scars or an NG (nasogastric) tube (which she had). It was a place of acceptance. What a gift to a pre-teenager, whose life and appearance had been so altered by surgery and chemotherapy!

Back to the party:  Codi has made a “Bucket List,” a list of things that she wants to be sure she accomplishes in her lifetime. One thing on her list was to attend a luau. She isn’t well enough to take a flight to Hawaii, so some wonderful friends from Camp Goodtimes decided to make the luau happen for her, here, in Washington State!

Hawaiian musicians and dancers came and sang traditional songs, danced the hula and taught a dance.

Friends gathered and brought food and drink.

Caring relatives & friends sent leis and decorations from Hawaii and other places.  

People dressed in Hawaiian-style attire, and music played all evening.

Photos were taken; camp friends Skyped from other parts of the country, joining the fun.

See the "rabbit ears" on the computer screen behind Codi? That's one of her camp counselors, Skyping from the other coast!

There was laughter; there was singing of camp songs.  There were "jazz hands."

There was celebration of friendship, and new friendships were made.

At the Luau, we learned from one of the Hawaiian ladies the meaning of “Aloha.” It is deeper than just “Hello” or “Goodbye.” The “ha” part of the word means “life.” So, we were told, when the greeting is exchanged, forehead touches forehead, and thus, we breathe life into one another, and we celebrate life.

It was a perfect gift for the occasion.

At one point, our host took the microphone, and pointed out that, although this luau was on Codi’s "Bucket List," and was arranged as a surprise for her, in fact, she had given all of us a gift in being able to share the luau with her. Her idea was a blessing to all of us, including the Hawaiian musicians and dancers who had never met her before, who learned about Camp Goodtimes West and its wonderful, supportive, loving, fun community.

Then Codi asked for the microphone. Our host brought it to her, where she sat in her wheelchair. She said she had one thing to say to all of us:  “Aloha.”

Another item on Codi’s list is to help a complete stranger. She can check that wish off, too: she surely helped us, and changed our lives for the better, at the luau. I’m thankful to have been part of the party. 

Aloha and God bless you, Codi and your family! May you achieve your dreams, including remission from cancer!

You can also read this posting at Hopeful Parents. 

Photos courtesy of Paul Dudley (in the orange shirt, above); you can read more about the party on his blog. He and his wonderful wife, Heidi, were our hosts.

Seafaring Imagery

"You are leaving port under sealed orders and in a troubled period.

You cannot know whither you are going or what you are to do. But why not take the Pilot on board who knows the nature of your sealed orders from the outset, and who will shape your entire voyage accordingly? He knows the shoals and the sandbanks, the rocks and the reefs, He will steer you safely into that celestial harbor where your anchor will be cast for eternity. Let His mighty nail-pierced hands hold the wheel, and you will be safe."  

  - Peter Marshall (1902-1949), "John Doe, Disciple: sermons for the young in spirit"

I loved reading about Peter Marshall in his wife, Catherine's, books. He sounded like a man of conscience, a loving and good man, and a trustworthy pastor.

His seafaring imagery appeals to me, though I don't interpret "you will be safe" to mean what it once meant, to me. It no longer promises, You will be protected from danger, storms will not arise and bad things will not happen to you. It now indicates something like, You will have guidance, you will have help, whatever may come.

Reading the words, "He will steer you safely into that celestial harbor where your anchor will be cast for eternity" suggests to me that I am going that place, with His guidance - no matter what happens between now and then. God's love for me, His act of creating me, and my love for God assure me that I am His. He will take me home, eventually. Until then, I am here in my temporary home, to learn what He has to teach me and to be prepared for my eternal home. Katie is there, now; how passionately I look forward to seeing her! We walked her home, and my heart tells me that now, she is waiting for us there. She told me that it would be so, just days before she died; I am counting on it.

November Sunrise

This morning, the sky looked like this:

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which turned into this

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later on.

I thought I’d share the view with you, before the “monsoon” season starts.

Happy Halloween!

Happy Halloween to you!

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Gregg was a skier for Halloween this year. Sort of.

Actually, he picked up his new skis and boots at the sports store. Then we went out for a beer and a bite to eat. Gregg tried on his skis and boots at home, and David took photos.

They are both getting pretty excited for ski season to start. The new Warren Miller ski movie is coming to our area in two weeks, and then it will be officially “game on!” for skiers. It's beautiful to see the Olympic mountains with their first dusting of snow of the season. I’m so glad that David and Gregg are going to be able to enjoy this sport together. It’s a thrill for David, and Gregg hasn’t bought new skis for YEARS…as in 30 years. So it should be really fun for them.

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And me...I was a cat-lover for Halloween. But, then, I’m a cat-lover every day, so it’s not much of a costume. Just add Latte and Liger!

I hope you had a happy Halloween. Remember to FALL BACK tonight!

Highway Robbery

I have one of these.  I think it’s a 2002 model.




Two of these came with it.

 I just learned that this gadget is called  a “Transponder Key.”

We need a third key for our third driver.

If you want a new transponder key, it will cost you roughly $100.00 at the dealership. You can’t have them copied at the hardware store, like you can with your house key. This is because there is some kind of fancy computer chip in the key. The car won’t start without this special chip-in-key.

Old car + new key = $100.00 dollars, GONE. Just to be able to get in and start the bl**dy thing.

I call that “highway robbery.”

Violation

"To the individual believer indwelt by the Holy Spirit there is granted the direct impression of the Spirit of God on the spirit of an individual, imparting the knowledge of His will in matters of the smallest and greatest importance. This has to be sought and waited for."  - G. Campbell Morgan

When I read this quote this morning, my thoughts immediately went to a Christian Science practitioner I knew when I was younger. He was a close friend of our family. I don't talk about him much, because what he did is of no great importance to me anymore - especially in light of what happened to Katie - but this quote brought him to mind.

He was the man who molested me, when I was a child. My brother and I went on camping trips with him, as did the children of other members of our church. His name was John Grant, and he was a famous horticulture expert before he became a full-time practitioner, teacher and lecturer in the Christian Science church. He was raised in Shanghai, China, by missionary parents. He had a deep voice and a British accent, and spoke with great authority and gravitas, as if he believed he was an oracle of the Word of God - or wanted his audience to believe it.

I confided in my parents about the abuse when I was about 9 years old. I never confronted him. I could hardly bear looking at him. The thought of standing up in court to face him, even as an adult, was too terrifying to me.

I know of two other victims. The church refuses to acknowledge this, though they have heard from the three of us.

He died in a wildfire that swept the hills of Oakland, California, in 1991. I was told that he and his wife stayed in their house, trying to keep it safe by spraying it with water from their garden hoses. It was a huge, consuming fire. When I heard about it, my first feeling was awe. My first thought was, "Yep." It still amazes me. I'm not glad that he and his wife died what was surely an agonizing death, but I am not sorry he's gone, either.

I wonder if he sought and waited for "the direct impression of the Spirit of God." Looking at his behavior, I doubt it. I wonder if it would have stopped him, or led him to treatment, or healed him of the desire to molest small children. I don't know anything about the inside of his mind and heart. I just don't see God's impression in his actions - I see manipulation, violation and control.

One of the interesting side effects of having been molested is that I have a heightened sensitivity to creepy vibes in men. I cannot explain this, and it's possible that I've been wrong sometimes, but I know that I feel it, almost like an aura, around some men. I steer far clear of them, without apology.

Before Katie got sick, I was working through some of the after-effects of the molestation. The actress Teri Hatcher wrote an article in 2006 in Vanity Fair magazine about her experience of sexual abuse as a child, and it brought a lot of feelings to the surface in me. I realized that it was HIS problem, not mine. I made a collage and wrote a poem (above), and that helped me to "clear the air" inside of me. Getting it out in visual form felt good; I would recommend such "art therapy."  When Katie was diagnosed with cancer, this part of my past became a very small and insignificant thing, in comparison to what she was suffering.

"...comfort yourself with Him, who is the only Physician of all our maladies. He is the FATHER of the afflicted, always ready to help us. He loves us infinitely more than we imagine: love Him then, and seek not consolation elsewhere: I hope you will soon receive it."   - "The Practice of the Presence of God," by Brother Lawrence

That quote gives an impression of the Spirit of God. I'm thankful that there are many good-hearted prophets and spiritual mentors in the world who bear His image.

Motorboat, Motorboat

One of the greatest sounds on earth, for me, is the sound of a cat purring. It never fails to make me happy.

When Latte and Liger are ecstatically happy, their purring sounds like our outboard motor, set on idle, in calm water. I LOVE that sound.

(The outboard motor I am talking about is in the photo above.)

This is one reason why I am a cat-person. Dogs have wonderful qualities, but barking vs. purring? I'm going with the motorboat.

[Lest you dog-lovers feel slighted, there is no need. Our friend Joanne came over the other night with her awesome Corgi (named Beamer). Beamer walked right into the house, and we gave him snacks; he did tricks and sat on the couch with me. And Beverly (Karyn's Yorkie from NY) came for a visit, and had snacks AND used her potty-mat, in our house. We like dogs; we LOVE cats.]

Good News for Katie's Comforters Guild

Be sure to check out the news at Katie's Comforters Guild's Blog.

Snowbirds

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One of my favorite things about my parents is the fact that they have the ability to be silly. Very silly. You can see what I mean in these photos.

My dad was in theatre when he was a young man, and he was a disc jockey, too. He has a natural penchant for the dramatic, and especially for humor. My mom laughs more easily than any other person I know. They are both quick-witted, and are a match made in heaven.

Mom and Dad came over last night. They are “snowbirds,” and are flying south for the winter today. We traditionally have them over for dinner on the night before they depart, so that they don’t have to keep any food in the refrigerator, or go to any trouble on their last night at home. We call this dinner (with no disrespect to anyone) the last supper.

David was the photographer last night, during the cocktail hour, and these are his photos.

Bon Voyage, Snowbirds! We love you and are looking forward to seeing you soon!

"The Heavens Declare the Glory of God"

Psalm 19: "The heavens declare the glory of God,
and the firmament proclaims his handiwork.
Day pours out the word to day,
and night to night imparts knowledge.
R. Their message goes out through all the earth.
Through all the earth their voice resounds,
and to the ends of the world, their message."


"May the sun bring you new energy by day,
may the moon softly restore you by night,
may the rain wash away your worries,
may the breeze blow new strength into your being."   -Apache Blessing


I took these photos early this morning. The sky was beautifully lit, with hot pink, pale blue and gray.

It seems as if the "theme for the day" in my devotionals is finding God through Nature; I like that.

I've heard it said that Nature is God's first Bible. That makes sense. It's easy to see God in the beauties of Nature: artistry, creativity, love, life, newness, freshness, infinite variety, individuality, abundance for all of the senses to enjoy.

The harshness of Nature is also a teacher, but I've never known quite what to make of it. I learn impermanence from it; it inspires awe, makes me grateful for small gifts, humbles me...and sometimes, that harshness is frightening.

Ephesians 2:19-22  "Brothers and sisters: You are no longer strangers and sojourners, but you are fellow citizens with the holy ones and members of the household of God, built upon the foundation of the Apostles and prophets, with Christ Jesus himself as the capstone. Through him the whole structure is held together and grows into a temple sacred in the Lord; in him you also are being built together into a dwelling place of God in the Spirit."

I need this belonging, this membership in a household. That's a vital part of my humanity, to belong to something larger than myself. To be reminded that I am part of "the household of God" is a comfort. Remembering that He is building me, with other family members, "into a dwelling place" for Himself is an honor, and a humbling gift. He is doing the work. I can rest, if I can just remember this!

I need to allow God to hold me, hold my grieving heart, hold the brokenness and heaviness, and all of the rest of me. Consciously, to give Him my grief, rather than trying to hold and carry it myself, takes awareness, trust and humility. May He form me into a place for Himself to dwell.

Come, Lord Jesus.

"The Bible calls the good person's life a light; and it is the nature of light to flow out spontaneously in all directions, and fill the world unconsciously with its beams."  - Horace Bushnell

I Am Not a Fan

I am not a fan of baseball, though I have liked one or two players, in my day. For example, I dated a baseball player in college. And even though I never met him, my love for his family makes me a fan of Moe Drabowsky. And I supported David's love for his Little League team, and attended all of his games, because of my love for him. So I don't dislike the players, but I think the sport could use a few of my ideas for improvement.

For example, please lose:  the spitting. The public scratching of private places. The long pauses. The polyester.

My intense dislike of baseball started during my first marriage...to a baseball fanatic. It's safe to say that this man loved baseball more than he loved many things in life, including me. He certainly preferred it to - let's call it romance. (That's a euphemism, my friends, but let's call it that, because my son might read this someday.)

Since I was a "nice girl," he was my first - and I intended him to be my ONLY. But as the marriage went on, I saw that I would never be, to him, what I desired to be, to my husband. I could not compete with the box scores. I was no match for the excitement of the Red Sox. The Green Monster was one of my enemies. Not another woman, but baseball itself, became a focus for my jealous emotions. It wasn't the only problem; it was simply something on which I could FOCUS my disappointment and frustration. I was unhappy, and then angry, and then, very, VERY UNHAPPY.

We eventually divorced. I've not liked baseball since.

So imagine my surprise at finding an article about baseball that I not only enjoyed, but that illuminated some of the finer points of strategy for me! It's about the pitcher vs. the batter, and is in the magazine called THE WEEK, in the October 23rd issue. The title of the article is "Who Owns Home Plate?" and is an excerpt from a new book by Reggie Jackson and Bob Gibson called Sixty Feet, Six Inches. It's really fascinating. I recommend it to anyone, even someone who doesn't like baseball.

And I am now married to a man who loves me, much more than baseball. (Don't you just love a happy ending?)

Tennis Team Banquet

Last night, we hosted the Tennis Team banquet here. About 50 people gathered in our home to celebrate the boys' accomplishments this season with a party.

They placed at the top of their league (they won), and they did it by playing fair and working hard.  We are very proud of them, and especially of the quality of their character - individually, and as a group.

This is the largest group of people we've ever had inside of our house, and it was so crowded that I had trouble getting good photos. During dinner, some of us had to stand, and it was difficult to walk around, but I loved feeling the warmth and happy energy in the house. The boys roamed around, ate voraciously and then we gathered to hear Coach address the crowd. Each player received a certificate, a Varsity letter, an award, or some combination of the above. Coach made a comments about each one of the team members, his contributions, character and progress this year. I appreciated this greatly, as I couldn’t have done that for 20+ boys – and  I loved learning a bit more about each one!

I took the photos during Coach DeVries’ speech, trying not to distract people, and listening while I snapped away. Now, I wonder, am I allowed to post photos of other people's kids?

David received an award:  The Viking Award.
 
You may recall the he received this same award last year. It’s given to the athlete who embodies the qualities of scholar, athlete and excellence of character. Our high school’s mascot is the Viking, since we live in a town that was settled by (and is still populated by a lot of) Norwegians. Grandpa G., Gregg  and David have all been Viking athletes,  but David holds the award, for the second time. We love him, and we admire his character and the values that he holds and embodies. David is his own man, and he is a good one.

I am thankful to God that He sent us the two wonderful people who are our children. And I wish Katie had been here to enjoy the party (and all of the handsome boys who were all over the house) – she would have loved it! (One small photo of a part of the group can’t hurt, can it?)

Since you asked:  we took a lot of shortcuts, to make this as easy on everyone as possible. (I used to be able to host 30+ people without difficulty, but my brain doesn’t work the way it did in the past in multitasking.) We bought five lasagnes from Costco, paper plates and napkins, plastic utensils (sorry, Suz!) and soda, sparkling  juice and water (we did recycle these containers). We served coffee (if it hadn’t been a school function, we would have served wine, too, but we couldn’t). I bought 4 loaves of French bread, sliced it and made garlic butter, which was brushed on and then baked into it. Our guests each signed up to bring either a salad or a dessert. It was perfect! Plenty of food, and even some leftovers. With Gregg's and David's help, the house was cleaned up and things were put away by bed time. Thanks, guys!

As a group, we purchased gift certificates for both Coach DeVries and Covey, for use at  Burrata Bistro (our neighbors’ - Kim & Alfonso’s - restaurant). Both coaches have very young children, so we figured they could use a quiet, romantic, delicious dinner that they don’t have to cook!

It’s hard to believe that four years of high school tennis are already at an end. It was a wonderful experience for David, and we are thankful to the coaches and other team members for making it so.

Tennis Season is Ending

This has already been a busy week.


On Monday, David participated in the League Tennis Tournament. That was an all-day event, in which he played two matches. I won't go into the details, but let's just say that there are players who are willing to cheat, repeatedly, when they are under pressure. I wonder what life has in store for young people who are willing to trade their integrity in order to win.  By the way, if you are interested in reading a well-written interview with such a person, hop over to http://www.vanityfair.com/ and read the article about Marc Dreier. It's a very illuminating cautionary tale, which I suggest should be required reading in high schools around the country (especially after seeing two young men - on different teams, at different events - cheating in sports this season).

Yesterday, I cleaned our house in preparation for the Tennis Team Banquet, which will take place in our home tonight. Since this is David's senior year, I thought it would be fun for us to host it; I'm finishing the preparations today. It looks as if we are going to have something like 45 or 50 people here!


Yesterday afternoon, I accompanied David to Seattle, where we met Gregg and drove to Bellevue to see a presentation about a college in which David is interested. It's a wonderful school, and I became tearful as I was listening to the students and faculty speaking about it. I'm so excited for David and this next "frontier" that awaits him. He is standing on the brink of discovery, challenges, adventure and opportunity:  it's thrilling to be a witness to this. College was all of that, and more, for me; I wish I had been more mature back then, but that's not the way it works when you are 18 and leaving home for the first extended period of time. So I watch him, and hound him to get all of his preparatory work completed in a timely manner, and watch some more.

I love being a mother.

Got to go and finish getting ready!

There is a new posting over at the Katie Gerstenberger Endowment blog.