Wednesday, November 5, 2008

I Miss Katie

I miss Katie.

I missed her when I was making cake batter yesterday, cracking four eggs into the mixing bowl. She loved to crack eggshells.

I missed her today when I saw the picture of Monet's Japanese Footbridge in his garden at Giverny. She loved her book, Linnea in Monet's Garden; we read it many times, and dreamed of going to see that garden together.

I missed her when I thought of shopping at Nordstrom - no more of that, and no Nordstrom fashion shows together, or make-up sessions, or first real bra fitting, either.

I missed her when I thought about the spa in Palm Desert - we'll never get to take her there for Girls' Day Out. She'll be with me in my heart, but not there with us to enjoy the pampering for herself.

I missed her when I saw the jewelry tree in a gift catalog - she doesn't get to have my jewelry, or to pass it along to any children she might have. I have to go through hers someday, and decide what to do with it. Can't do it now.

I miss kissing her cheeks and her chin; I miss feeling her silky hair. I miss her sassiness and her humor. I miss her conversation at dinner. I miss her "take" on life. I just miss her.

It's a hard morning. I'm going for a walk, and then I'm going to pin some quilts for Children's Hospital.


Jennifer said...

I am holding you -- in the midst of your deep, cavernous ache for Katie -- in my thoughts today, Karen.

Jesus, place your hand upon her and grant her your peace in her grief.


KBL 2 ORD 2 SAN 2 LUV said...

Oh Karen. This just broke my heart for you. I am crying at my desk. Like Jennifer, I am sending you a deep, deep silent hug. I am so sorry. May you find peace and ease at some point today. Thank you for allowing us to know Katie.

Tara said...


You are in my prayers today.

May God bless you and give you comfort today.

BusyBeeSuz said...

My thoughts are with you. I hope you feel better soon, I can't imagine what you feel....but know that lots of people care about you.
Take care,

MB said...

sweet friend!!!!!:( enough said!!MB

Clippy Mat said...

I just cannot imagine. You must miss her so much.
I hope that there is some comfort for you today and that even tho' you miss her, you feel some peace and acceptance at some point, if only for a short time.
thoughts and prayers for you,

A said...

I love you...hugging you...Angela

Amy said...

Though I caught this at the end of the day, I am hoping your day got a little 'brighter'. Such simple little things to miss and adore about Katie that many take for granted. I love that you have those memories and that you remember them and her so well.

I am lifting you up in prayer right now...hugs friend!

Kay said...

I'm so sorry you're feeling down today. I know it's so hard!

HappyWifeHappyLife said...

Praying for you, my friend.
May God meet you in the midst of this and slip His hand in yours and give you peace and comfort...

Karla W. said...

Sending hugs your way. Love Karla

karengberger said...

Thank you for your prayers and kind words; they helped. I'm doing better tonight. God bless you!

Anonymous said...

I miss Katie, too, and I didn't even know her - you are letting us that didn't have the pleasure of knowing her here on earth (there's still heaven) get to know her.

I was weeding through my catalogs today and saw a beautiful necklace that had this inscription: "heaven has in store what thou has lost". It gave me such peace - I lost my mother before I was 20 and my father before I was 30 - but I know we will be reunited one day. I know that losing a parent does not compare to losing a child, but the HOPE is still there - to be reunited. *Ü* God bless you tonight. L in Alaska

Smileygirl said...

Sending you love Karen. That picture of you both is one of my favorites. You both look so happy and warm. Katie was so beautiful, and now that I've met David I can see her in his smile. It's so good that you're writing your feelings. Hopefully it helps.

Hugs to all of you.