A Day with Kathleen

Yesterday, I went to the beach with my friend, Kathleen. We go way back to BSF days together; that's where I met Kathleen, about a decade ago. She has a radiance about her that is tremendously attractive; I recall thinking, when I first met her, that I would love to be her friend. Imagine my delight when our friendship began to grow...and my surprise, when I learned that this radiant woman had two sons, and the younger one, Hayden, had a brain tumor! How could anyone be so full of grace in such circumstances? I learned that the answer lies in her vibrant relationship with God.

Kathleen is the friend who taught me that moving to Ronald McDonald House was possible; she taught me that you can "do" the cancer journey any way that fits your family. I knew this years before cancer entered our lives, because of her example, her creativity and her passion for her family.

To give you an idea of the connection that I feel with Kathleen, I will tell you this: after getting to know her older son, Gunnar, I asked Kathleen if we could broker a marriage arrangement between him and Katie (he is a gem). We still laugh about that!

When Hayden passed away, I was heartbroken for Kathleen and her family. I felt impelled to take a gift over to their house, wanting to simply leave it on the porch and not invade their privacy. When Gunnar opened the door and invited me inside, I did not know what to do, but I went in. Kathleen came downstairs and welcomed me, and I began to cry. Of course, I felt like a failure at that point...I had come hoping to bring comfort, and I ended up crying in her arms...but she understood. I gave her my gift, which was a calligraphy of the 23rd Psalm, made by a friend of ours (and cancer-survivor), Gerry. I was deeply touched to see it hanging in Kathleen's bedroom, when I went to pick her up yesterday morning.

Kathleen and I share a passion for beaches and beach glass. After Hayden died, Kathleen gave me a few precious pieces of his beach glass collection. What a gift of the heart -- things that he himself had handled.

I keep them in a seashell in our guest bathroom...the one with the beach glass counter top that I made, when we were building this house. They remind me of the brave and sweet boy whose life helped me (and many others) to learn important lessons, and the friend who shared those lessons so generously and graciously.

Walking yesterday in the wind and sunshine, we found so many heart-shaped pieces of glass and rocks (broken and whole) that I stopped picking them up; it was enough to know that they were there, in our path...a path strewn with love and memories. We even saw a beautiful orange butterfly; butterflies always make me feel as if Katie's spirit is near.

Kathleen & I walked for over 3 hours, talking the entire time. We had a picnic lunch at the half-way point. I felt cleansed and energized by the time I took her home.
I picked David up at school, went home to get cleaned up, and we met my parents and our friends, Fred & Charlotte at Burrata Bistro for dinner.

It was a lovely day.